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Rachelle of Rhia
17 September 2011 @ 04:26 am
[Filter: Devine]

Don't you know how much trouble this could get you in?

Devine ... how long has this been going on? Be honest. You're lucky it was me who found out. You're really lucky nobody else found out sooner. I mean, it doesn't seem like you've exactly been really careful about this ...

What are you even going to do? You know she's a thief.
Mood: stressedtorn
17 September 2011 @ 11:10 am
[Filter: Lydia]

Lydie ...

Is something upsetting you, darling? I know there was all of that bad business with Sir Jason, and whatever it was, I don't need to hear a word about to know that you were in the right. But you've seemed just more and more inconsolable every day, and I don't know what to do with you.

Let your big brother help. Who do I have to duel for your honour?
Mood: worriedconcerned
Lord Hasten of Lireth
17 September 2011 @ 11:25 am
[Filter: Private]

I can't do it all.

Dragons damn me, I can't. I can't. There are so many things to be dealt with and maintained and managed and controlled, so bloody many, and they're all slipping through my fucking fingers. I can't even just throw it all aside and accomplish the most important part: keeping peace in my bloody city. Even that is beyond me, that one thing. The refugees grow more unruly every day. The riots have stopped, yes -- the Lion can put into fear into dirty peasants for that -- but the murmurs grow louder every day. I can push and push and push and it avails to nothing. I see now that there's only one way it can all end, and I can't see how I'm to prevent it. I can only keep it from boiling over in the only way I know how.

... this would never have happened to Father. He would have controlled the situation. He'd have found a solution, somehow. He could do more than enact curfews and order arrests. He'd make some demonstration that showed just how heartlessly cruel he could be, and then none of them would dare challenge his authority.

Not Hasten. No, he doesn't have the stomach for it.

And to focus on the discontent and approaching disaster in the city, I must needs look away from my home, my family, my other duties. Oh, yes, and that is certainly wise. Tarmon is my Sovereign Lord, against all common wisdom or sense, and he commanded me to arrange his swearing in ceremony, which certainly should have taken place by now. He will frame me as a dissenter for the King, I am sure, and my damned reputation in Eblar will only go so far. This is Dentoria. Certain things must be respected and obeyed.

That part, I cannot bring myself to care about.

My true concern is that every moment I do not watch him like an eagle, warning him with my eyes, he is upon Amaeyra like a pouncing animal. I should have expected this. Truly, I should have. He is a child, he has always been a child. He cares not for rules or what is or is not done -- when he sees a plaything, he will have it, all the rest be damned. Telling him he cannot only inflames him all the more. What is to be done about that?

And Elthea. Elthea is there, Elthea is always going to be there, watching, reading, waiting.

As for Lord Dillon -- Dragons, I cannot even take the time to consider Lord Dillon, but, oh, he can certainly find the time to feel personally affronted by it.

[Filter: Isanae]

He is your husband. Surely you must have devised some manner in which to draw his attentions to you when he is being --

Surely you can't just let him do these things he does, say these things he says.
Mood: distressedflipping out
17 September 2011 @ 11:27 am
[Filter: Loki]

Why aren't you two out yet?

I ... I'm getting worried, Loki! You went in yesterday afternoon. I thought ... I thought surely by the time I woke up, this morning, you would be free of the labyrinth, but when I went down, Sir Keagan said ...

There has to be something you can do. It's been so long, now ... you can't just stay in there ...

I'm afraid.
Mood: scaredscared
17 September 2011 @ 11:47 am
Ah ... in the preparations for the trip, I seem to have forgotten to write here again about my decision. As I mentioned before, I was considering taking part in this year's Pilgrimage. Since that time, I have made all the arrangements and now Jayden and I are on our way to Lucre. I am very grateful that I was given leave to go, though I have been sent with some work to do along the way, mostly just more memorization of herbs and herb lore.

It is strange to be travelling again, after being so long in one place. But it is a welcome strangeness, especially for Jayden who has always adored flying. Though he may adore it less, after so many days spent in his harness.

[Filter: Cameryn]

I have no heard from you in some time, which I expect is on account of you being busy with ... everything. I hope you are well.

I am afraid it appears as though your offer to show us Lucre will have to wait for the time being. But please do not worry about that or about either of us. Given the timing, I am sure we will be fine.
17 September 2011 @ 11:51 am
I heard the men grumbling today. "It never rains on a march in the stories," he said.

Which isn't true. I can think of ten good stories off the top of my head that include both rain and marching. It's even freezing rain in some of them. But I think I understood what he was saying, and he's right.

Bad things happen in stories. The world isn't perfect there. Only someone who only ever listens to love ballads and folk heroes would say that. A good story makes you cry and makes you angry. They don't all end happily. Some of them don't make you crack a single smile from beginning to end. And some of those are some of the best ones there are.

But ... this is different.

When it rains on a march in the story, it means something. Even if it's just something subtle and poetic and irrelevant to what's happening, it always means something. It means that there's ill fortune on the horizon. Or means that the elements are trying to hold the men back. Or it means that they're brave enough to press on despite it. Sometimes, all it means is that the mood is dark and soldiers get rained on, but even that is something. When it rains on the march here, it's just damned rain.

Nothing means anything at all.

I don't blame them for being demoralized.
Mood: blahwet
Seraphine (Elina)
17 September 2011 @ 12:02 pm
[Filter: Private]

[there is a long pause between the filter and the words that follow, and the writing, when it comes, is halting]

Erestor ...

E-Erestor ... he ... he never wanted to play the Festival game. He ... just ... wanted to have a normal ... a normal Festival. Just ... normal. He never wanted to ... to play.

I always made him. I always ... I always wanted to play the game, and it was always better for the Festival. I'd ... we'd get up long before dawn. I'd make him get up. We ... we would walk ... walk through the palace, sneaking about. It was ... oh ... three? Four ... there was almost no one awake ... and for those who were, we ... we knew how to avoid them ...

... I knew how to avoid them. I ... watched for that sort of thing. Tricks ... tricks, and ... and games ... and little deceptions ... the little cruelties, the little things, the ...

It ... it wasn't in Erestor's nature. None of ... none of it ... none of it was ever in his nature. None of it ever ...

Ever ...

Where are you, now? What have I done? What did I do? Why did I -- why did I just ... why?

Are you even ... are you even still ...

[the writing strengthens and becomes very focused after this point]


[Filter: Public]

I have such lovely gifts to bring to everyone at court on Thursday ...~ I hope you all have the same for me? I love receiving gifts almost as much as I love giving them, and ah, the Festival parties at the Floran court are just so wonderful~~ I know it's going to be just, ah, just an amaing day! I can hardly wait until then ...

Hm, but I've been thinking a lot about Milesia, lately ... ah, I think I can remember spending Festivals there, with the family ... maybe. It's very blurry, but ... well, I know I was there~ Everyone knows the royal family leaves Eblar in September and spends Festival at Milesia ...~
Mood: indescribableindescribable
17 September 2011 @ 12:10 pm
[Filter: Private]


What am I doing?

All this ... all this thought. I'm like a finicky grandmother, trying to choose a gift for her. Nothing seems right. No, that's wrong, plenty seems right enough, but nothing seems perfect, and for some reason only perfect will suffice.

What am I doing?

I ... never do this. Never. Not with anyone. I even used to choose Mother's gifts within five minutes of reaching the market, and Mother ... Mother was damn well everything. But it's never mattered to me, I've never cared enough to hem and hah and deliberate. I chose my wife's gift as an afterthought, in August.

It's just the Festival.

... Demi loves the Festival, though.

Or she's always seemed to. Maybe pretended to. I don't know. I don't know, I can't read her mind. And maybe it's an excuse to say it's that she cares, that I'm making myself go through the effort of caring because she cares because -- because I care, too. I care a lot.

I care -- too much.


I care far, far too much, much more than is smart, right, or in any way even -- slightly appropriate.


There, fine, there. Are you happy now? There.
Mood: guiltyguilty
Pillar of Light
17 September 2011 @ 02:49 pm
To answer a question asked of me several weeks ago: Yes, it's finally over~

And look which one of us survived to tell everyone about it. Was there ever any doubt that it would be me~? Hah. You won't see that one writing again, I promise you that.

I can only hope to see some of you avenging hopefuls, soon. Some of you must know where I am, now. I won't be here for long, so I suggest you move quickly~ That poor Messenger put a great deal of faith in your ability to make sure her death wasn't a complete waste, for your side, don't disappoint her~
Jessica of Mera
17 September 2011 @ 03:13 pm
[Filter: Private]

I'm going to prove that Keran is involved in this. If I had something to hold up in front of everyone, something that proved, beyond a shadow of all doubt, then they'd have to listen. This whole insane thing would grind to a halt, with a revelation like that. There's still time. They won't take Noye in a day.

It all comes back to those reports from Noye, the ones with all that fabricated proof that they were planning something. Who brought those to Lord Carlton's attention? That's who I want to start with. His advisors. The ones that convinced him that a preemptive strike was the only answer. Every single person that was pushing for that ... that's what I need to know. Then, once I have a list, I put my people to work. I want to know how long they've been in Varise. Where they come from. If they have family here. What their record is on this whole stupid issue.

All that information exists, somewhere, and I'm going to find it.

I'm going to figure this all out, and then we'll see if they can just ignore everything I'm saying.
Mood: determineddetermined
17 September 2011 @ 03:22 pm
[Filter: Nathan]

Ugh. This whole thing at the docks -- how am I supposed to help anyone if they won't talk to me?

No one wants to answer any questions. No one will say anything against their employer, and it's obvious that they're all just afraid to -- which means there's definitely something going on, right? But I can't do anything without proof, or at least evidence. The closest anyone came to telling me anything useful was one of the younger girls, she said the only person that ever got out was Leanne, and then she wouldn't tell me anything about her! What am I supposed to do with one name?

This is all so frustrating. It's obvious that someone needs to step in, here, but there's not enough to go on to involve the guard.
Mood: angryangry
17 September 2011 @ 03:30 pm

Lady Aes! Karlesta Faedya and I received your invitation, this morning, and we would be glad to visit this evening, very glad! But after I'd sent your girl back with our acceptance, I realized I should have told you -- we are going to go out to finish our Festival shopping, this afternoon! Of course we can still make dinner with you, that won't be a problem at all, but I thought that perhaps you'd like to join us shopping, as well! If you have the time or inclination, we'd be glad to have you along!

That goes for any of you, in fact! I hope that we'll see many familiar faces about, between stalls! Oh, but I would not be surprised to hear that most of you have finished all this already. I do this every year, I swear. Always at the last minute, shame on me.
Mood: cheerfulcheerful
Ethne of House Karnach
17 September 2011 @ 04:25 pm
[Filter: Gideon, in Atsirian]

Just so you know, love, I've heard some rumours that Captain Darius is pushing to arrange for the Queen to travel out to the docks for a personal visit to the Queen Edalene's Beauty. The notion is gaining some popularity ... I've no doubt that he'll have a very grand reception prepared for her, and surround her with crewmen that have only the most wonderful things to say about him.

Something to keep an eye on ...

... But apart from all that. You'll be joining me and my family at the manse the morning of the Festival, won't you? Mother is expecting you to be there. She mentioned it this morning, and I realized I'd just been assuming you knew.
Mood: blahblah
Suaimeas (Patience)
17 September 2011 @ 04:29 pm

I think I might have to leave.

I've caught that same girl watching me a few more times, since the last time I wrote. I don't know why she can't just mind her own business. Everyone else here does.

This is so frustrating. I feel like I could find something here, maybe, if I had more time.

And my sister still hasn't written back to me. Prudence, I'm worried. Maybe if I admit it in front of everyone, you'll see how serious I am. Please write back.
Mood: uncomfortableuncomfortable
17 September 2011 @ 05:01 pm
[Filter: Private]

All right, Philip, you can do this.

It's not that difficult, is it? Just a conversation. It won't be hard at all! I can do this. I ... need to do this. And I can always see where it goes from there.

Dragons, I have no idea where it goes from there.

Think about that later. For now, just -- just focus.
Mood: nervousnervous
17 September 2011 @ 05:55 pm
[Filter: Dad, Zahra and Karia]

They searched through the boat. Nothing. No one but the crew left on it. No outsiders, no ... no Brett.

... It feels wrong to just move on, without ... knowing, for sure, but old Captain Jack's been making noises, he wants us gone. Doesn't want to see us again, either.

At least Karia's alive.

I don't know what I'd do if ... well. She might be reading, now, not sure. Won't embarass her too much, heh. ...

... Welcome to Kavan, I guess. What do we do, now? Karia's still not fit to be moving around, much ...
Mood: blankblank
17 September 2011 @ 06:14 pm
[Filter: Edalene, in Atsirian]

I think I can prove that Reeve is working with Jamaella, now. If you're still interested in that ...
Mood: workingworking
17 September 2011 @ 06:15 pm
September 17th

Just over a year since I last wrote. I have had nothing else to say. I would have stayed away longer but something drew me back, I do not know what it was. Curiosity, perhaps ... if I even have such a thing anymore.


There is much chaos here these days. Lord Father wants to ignore what the people say but everyone else is saying it too.

People are afraid.
17 September 2011 @ 07:29 pm
What is with you people, lately?

I thought you'd all just agreed to quiet down and bugger off, and let our normal friends have the Channels. For the greater good!

And now here you all are again, just as bad as ever!

And don't you talk down to me for contributing to the problem, either. I'm well aware, and I gave this a lot of thought before I wrote, and I don't want to hear it! I just wanted to announce that I, for one, am very much in favor of everyone shutting up, again! You people are insufferable! Oh, I killed sooooooo many people~ Oooh, I'm a big scary Pillar~ Ooooh, I'm the best Messenger ever, look at how much blood is on my hands. Well, none of you can prove a thing. You're all so ridiculous. It's all just talk, I can't believe anyone takes any of us seriously.

And don't you start with those stupid bloody stains again, either, I don't buy any of that. It's not so hard to make red dye. It's not so hard to say any of the things you've all been saying. No one's impressed. No one cares.

Blah blah blah blah blah. Right before the Festival, too, how tasteless can you be?
17 September 2011 @ 08:53 pm
you know

Mari is right. she's absolutely right I don't know why I didn't see it before. it's pointless waiting on something that's right in front of you isn't it? you don't go to -- to a buffet -- and -- something, I can't remember exactly what she said, but she was so right!!!

why didn't I see all this before. It's all so simple!!! I'm just going to take her advice she's so much smarter than me about this sorts of things. I can admit it. I'm -- I can! And I will! And I'm going to!
Mood: drunkdrunk
Lady Isanae of House Lireth
17 September 2011 @ 09:42 pm
[Filter: Private, in Old Dentorian]

Toying with Francisca is not going to earn you any attention from me, you insufferable

And Tarmon, honestly, the man could at least wait until I've left the room, before

If Hasten thinks for one minute that I'll throw myself at


Damn them all.
Mood: angryangry
17 September 2011 @ 10:25 pm
[Filter: Franelcrew]

Fucking hell.

Look, I was joking my ass off last night over this, and it sure seemed funny over 24 hours ago, but I think it might officially be fucking time that we start panicking here!

How the hell are we supposed to get them out? We've been following yells since last night and it's not getting us anywhere. Sometimes I can't even hear you guys, not even faintly, and we're all fucking hoarse and people back up in the real world are probably going to start asking so questions, so -- what? I mean --

[Filter: Franelcrew, excluding Irving and Loki]

I mean, fuck, they don't have any food. They seriously don't fucking have food in there! They can't just not eat. How fucking long are they supposed to not eat for?!

[Filter: Franelcrew]

Yeah. What's the plan, here? We need a fucking plan here.
Mood: scareduhhh????
17 September 2011 @ 10:37 pm
Mood: hungryhungry
Francisca of Emeron
17 September 2011 @ 10:50 pm
Oh, no one is going to believe this, but I swear that I'm telling the truth! I can't believe it's really happening, but it's true!

I was playing Settlers of Kanemoria with Cavvy, and she was winning by at least three points, but I was about to get the longest road, and take it away from her. Anyway, Sir Austin walked by while this was going on, and started watching us! After he started watching I knew I just had to win, so I started doing everything I could think of to do it. It took a half hour, and I still lost, but only by one point. Cavvy was sweating by the time it was done!

And then when we were done, Sir Austin asked me if I would teach him how to play tomorrow! I didn't think it would interest him at all, and I can't believe he even asked, but I'm so excited for tomorrow I don't know what to do with myself!
17 September 2011 @ 11:24 pm
[Filter: Private]

There's no time to settle everything nice and decently. Tallys may say she's having second thoughts, but it's far too late to back out of this, now, and she knows it.

I should just tell her that one of Devine's chatty cousins found us out, and now I really have no choice but to go. With or without her. It's only a matter of time until it all comes boiling up and over, and --

[a long pause]

Why have I clung so hard to this place all these years, exactly? Stubbornness, plain and simple. I hate that old man. I've always been looking forward to his dragonsdamned funeral. And now after all of this, I'll miss it, after all. Doesn't it just figure?

Yes, the world is such a funny place.

[another pause]

Oh, Devine, why couldn't you be more careful? You stupid boy. You've ruined everything.
Mood: rushedrushed