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Lord Derek of Allba
30 July 2011 @ 12:51 am
[Filter: Old High Dentorian]

It's simply amazing how fast time flies. It seems as if we only just left Allba on our trip to Rowan and now we're nearing Tersel. I am expecting that this wedding will be an incredible event for all to remember.

Mm ... it's strange, though, that I haven't heard word from my brother and Cerise in so long. I'm sure Rylan has simply been busy with his work, and Cerise is with child and needs her rest. Still, being away from Allba for so long, not having eyes and ears open to the matters of state as often as I'd like, hm ...

I was expecting this journey and prepared accordingly, did I not? So why is being away so worrisome, I wonder.

[Filter: Constance, in Trade]

Constance, love, have you gone far? I entered the tent expecting to see you only to find you missing. Will you be long?
Mood: thoughtfulthoughtful
30 July 2011 @ 03:57 am
[Filter: Lauren]


Now, I know you don't want to talk to me. And you have every right not to. I've -- wronged you. Fairly terribly, in fact, and we both know it.

I'm not writing to you to -- to make excuses, or to try and make it seem as though I wasn't in the wrong back then. I was. It was one of the greatest mistakes I've ever made, and I don't have any explanations for it. There's nothing that I could say that would make it right, or that would make it never have happened. I know that.

What I want to say is that I'm sorry. You've ... always deserved better. From me, or from anyone else. I never should have done it, and if I could go back and stop myself, I would do it in a heartbeat. I don't expect your forgiveness, and I don't think I deserve it. And I'm not saying that to try and fish pity from you, I'm saying it because it's true.

All I want is to say that I'm sorry, and to try and make things right. For your sake, more than mine.

I'm sorry.

That's all.
Mood: uncomfortableuncomfortable
30 July 2011 @ 04:43 am
[Filter: Leon]

Okay, since you were asking, I talked to Dad today. I didn't tell him you were talking with me, though, because you know that'd just make him angry. And I need to have something private from him ...

I think we're planning to leave in early August. Probably by the ninth ... He said he wasn't setting a specific date in case something went wrong with Ash or with Angela, but he wanted to get going soon. I figured I should tell you ...

[there is a pause here]

[Filter: Aubrey]

Um, hey.
Mood: blankblank
30 July 2011 @ 05:59 am
[Filter: Sawyer]

I really think you should have called it quits a little earlier against that thing. Are you even going to be able to walk tomorrow? You look like hell. I hope nobody asks too many questions ...
Mood: worriedworried
Keane of House Sylea
30 July 2011 @ 06:07 am
[Filter: Relette]

Why aren't any of you shits listening to me?

Relette, you have to get the fuck out of there. With or without your girl. You can't just stay there and expect everything to -- they're -- you have to fucking leave, Relette, I don't give a Dragonsdamn shit about Beatrice.

You have to get out of there. You have to get out of there alive. Now. Lirit's too fucking stubborn to listen to direct orders so I thought maybe you'd listen to an appeal to sanity.

Get out of there. This isn't worth fucking dying for. None of it is worth dying for.
Mood: distresseddistressed
30 July 2011 @ 06:11 am
[Filter: Lysander]

If you're ready to talk like mature adults now, we need to talk about whatever this is that's going on with Varise.
Mood: crankycranky
30 July 2011 @ 06:17 am
[Filter: Josiah]

Well, now I'm the one waiting anxiously for news. Have you spoken to Amelie? I hope she was at least willing to cooperate, however devoted to her silly little scheme she happens to be.

I hope you appreciate just how distressed this entire matter has me! I've hardly been myself at court of late. Ask anyone, they'll tell you it's true!
Mood: curiouscurious
Aiden [Illuse]
30 July 2011 @ 06:25 am
[Filter: Jayne, in Kilian]

This may be a bit of a private question. I apologize. You don't have to answer it if you would rather not.

It has been so long since I've left home, and I tried to never get involved in Tallys' personal grudges even before I left. I ... am afraid I don't know anymore, why you two have always been at each other's throats.
30 July 2011 @ 06:45 am
[Filter: Private, in Atsirian]

The things that Lady Mother has been saying, lately ...

All of this talk about what an impression I've made on people here in Razen, how many connections I've formed, how well-spoken I've become, how well I've learned all of her lessons, how surprised she's been at how much I've absorbed how quickly ...

It's not just me she's saying it to, either. I've been listening to the conversations she's been having at the open houses we've been holding since ... since the day of the prison riots. She's saying it to them, too! All of the important people who come. And she's barely spoken to Saeritha Esh at all since then.

She always says to look for meaning in everything, and I've always tried to, because I know that I should. She's right. Small things conceal big things, and so everything is made up of small things, and they all have significance. But there's only one thing I can see this meaning, and, and ...

She can't be implying what I think she is ... can she?
Mood: pensivepensive
Anita of Vernhail
30 July 2011 @ 06:47 am
Lady Eliza!

I wrote to my family to invite them to Temair, as you said, and I've just received their response ... they would be thrilled to come, my lady! They told me to thank you very graciously for the invitation, so ... well, thank you so much! It's been so long ... I think they won't even recognize me, next time they see me! Oh, and I can't wait to tell all of them all about Lord Nicolas. I've told them in my letters, of course, but there's so much I've forgotten to say before ...
Mood: excitedexcited
30 July 2011 @ 06:52 am
[Filter: Private]

Damn logic.

"Maybe you should admit at this point that somebody has got it in for you. People keep showing up dead after long enough in every city you set up shop in, and they're always laid out somewhere nice and accessible for you to find them. Been happening for years and years, now. That's not any kind of coincidence anyone ever saw. No, some crazy person is following you. You need to watch your back, and even that might not do you any good."

Obvious enough. Ignoring it doesn't do any good, right?

Well, maybe I don't want to admit it. Maybe ignoring it puts a smile on my face and gets me through each day. A man can't live thinking about a knife at his throat. And if this crazy person wanted to kill me, why not just do it and stop laying out skinny little dead girls?!

It doesn't have to be a bad thing to just shut your eyes and keep moving on.

Not if it gets you the hell through.

[Filter: My Caravan]

Hot as hell out here, but believe it or not, it's a good time of year to travel anyway. No rain, and no highwayman is stupid enough to sit around hiding in a ravine with this sort of sun blazing down. Just put a handkerchief over your mouth to block out the dust, and you're fine.

We should make Salinda in good time.
Mood: scaredscared
30 July 2011 @ 06:56 am
[Filter: Private]

I don't want to tell her! I don't want to be the one who has to! Can't -- can't someone else?! Can't there be a bird, or, or a messenger, or ... or ...

Oh, diary.

Oh ...
Mood: indescribableindescribable
30 July 2011 @ 06:59 am
[Filter: Private, in Kilian]

It's ... difficult not to become attached to him.

It's not like that. It's not ... it's not that sort of a relationship. I know that, yes. I have no claim on him, and he has none on me, and that is how it should be. In my heart, I'm still a married woman. I'll be Justin's forever. He ...

There isn't any room for anyone else. There never will be.

But he was the only other man I'd ever been with, and that makes this ... strange. Difficult. It always meant one thing to me, and even though it means another, here, with Norman, sometimes, it feels like it should mean the same.

And it's hard to know where the boundaries are.

[Filter: Norman, in Kilian]

... you didn't come in last night. I ... was waiting for you.
Mood: confusedconfused
30 July 2011 @ 07:05 am
[Filter: Private]

I do want you to ask him not to write publically.

I want him to just go away, just be gone, and never remind me that he ever existed ever again. Because when I forget he's there, when I just -- can forget about all of it, then I don't feel so damned guilty. The second something reminds me of him, of his gentle smiles and the way he'd blush and how he always did absolutely everything to make me feel loved and special -- ugh.

Well, then I hate myself! And I hate hating myself. It's the worst feeling in the entire world, and, and, so what if I'd only hate myself more if I did scrub him out of every corner and use every bit of leverage I have to make him shut up and hide from me forever. It would be easy to ignore because I'd never see him!

I wish I were that bad a person.

I really do. I wish I were Destin.

This would be so much easier.

[Filter: Public]

... hey, guys~ Does anybody want to do anything this weekend? It seems like we've all been busy with our own things for a bit now, and it's been a long time since all the girls got together to hang out, doesn't it? It feels like it's been ages since I've seen Ally, and Lillian, we really only talk on the journals lately, don't we?

Maybe we could ... oh, I don't know. Something! Anyt
Mood: crappycrappy
Dillon of Rowan
30 July 2011 @ 07:20 am
[Filter: Lord Hasten]

You know, I had the thought that ... that perhaps we hadn't parted on the best of terms, when you left Keirnan, and that perhaps I owed you a bit of an apology for my ... behavior. I hope you'll accept it, as it is honest, and I'd like us to be friendly again during Chloe's wedding.

How are things in Lireth, my lord?
Mood: nervousnervous
30 July 2011 @ 07:39 am
[Filter: Private]

I don't know what's wrong with me.

Why should I care? I gave up on Davan ages ago. If he wants to have sex with that whining, bitching asshole who thinks he's so clever, what does it matter to me? We're only talking because he's in Nasen and I need information. That's all. This ship has sailed and made port and then sailed again!

It doesn't matter what he does or who he does it with. Who cares?


Well, I care. That's who.

Fuck me.

[Filter: Kray]

You know, I don't think we sleep together nearly often enough. For evidence, I'd like to point out that we've been married for two and a half years and only have one child, and I haven't been drinking any tea for any of that time. There's clearly a problem here.

You should do something to remedy it. Preferably sooner rather than later.
Mood: frustratedfrustrated
Maeve [[Blanche]]
30 July 2011 @ 07:53 am
[Filter: Private]

I do wish it had been more.

But I did decide to take this on his timetable, didn't I? And I don't want to scare him away anymore. Not now, not when we actually have a chance to spend some time together, a chance to actually enjoy each other's company without worrying if we have enough food to make it through the countryside, or when the next disaster is going to hit, or ...

It's ... it's nice, not having to worry about it. I'd missed it ... It's been so long since I've lived without that kind of paranoia. Since ...

Since when I first met him. Since before then, even ...

I don't want to ruin that.

I can wait. I can. It'll all be perfect. I want it to be perfect. He deserves for it to be perfect.
Mood: lovedloved
Keran of Sarrca
30 July 2011 @ 08:01 am
[Filter: Private]

Fine then, my lord.

Ask your little questions. Share your distress. Agree eagerly that justice was done, nod your head and smile. You're a horrid liar; do you think I can't tell? Do you think I can't see the terror in your eyes, the fear always lurking there that I'll somehow find out what it is you've done?

Oh, I don't need to find out, my lord. I already know.

But please. Do continue to play your games with me. I'm so lacking in amusements now that the Crow is dead.
Mood: annoyedannoyed
30 July 2011 @ 08:21 am
[Filter: Demi]

... have you talked to Daisy, yet? Do you know what that was all about, last night?
Mood: curiouscurious
Keane of House Sylea
30 July 2011 @ 11:00 pm
[Filter: Damien]

And where the fuck are you during all of this?!

Do you think you can just sit out there for the rest of your life after Varise crushes Noye? Where the shit have you been the whole time this was going on? What the fuck is wrong with you, off sailing merrily along and chasing fucking pirates while Varise bears down on your own fucking House?

I hope you fucking rot out there. And I hope Varise chases you down and rips your ship to pieces.
Mood: angryangry
30 July 2011 @ 11:35 pm
[Filter: Private]

Something's brewing. Always a possibility, in this damned country, but can't shake the feeling off, this time. Someone's been telling stories. First an army no one can track down, and now mages that don't exist. Both sides of this little skirmish won't listen to any talk about another side, and fair enough, when they're having trouble with the side they can see.

Who would benefit from that? The fucking trouble isn't coming up with who, it's narrowing it down. If that isn't an indication of how screwed up this place is, I'll go sober for a month.
Mood: grumpygrumpy
30 July 2011 @ 11:56 pm
I've been thinking about what I would do if I wasn't a serving girl at the Scales. It was hard, at first, because I didn't have the faintest idea of what work I could do. I'm a woman, so I can't be a fisherman. I don't know how to grow fruit or vegetables or flowers or herbs, and I don't even have the space for plants to even start learning. I'm terrible at sewing, and I can't paint or draw. There's really not a lot I can do.

But I'd like to have a market stall. I could make and sell jewellery. It's not gold or silver or diamonds, but I can make pretty things. Everyone should have something that's pretty.
Mood: sadsad