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27 February 2011 @ 12:10 am
[Filter: Benedette]

So, um, you can tell me to just go away if I'm being way too nosy! I know I do get nosy sometimes, so if I'm butting in too much or anything just tell me to buzz off and I will! But, well, there are all those girls writing about Leon, but I know you have to keep kind of quiet about things and ...

And I just thought you probably still didn't want me to let Leon know I know what's happening! So, I just wondered ... what you thought of him, I guess?? I know, I'm being so nosy, sorry!
Mood: curiouscurious
Kara (Aekaran)
27 February 2011 @ 12:30 am
Nothing like finally getting a little more light in a day. Fighting in a someone else's war with your hands frozen to the hilt of your sword and caked with someone else's chilled blood is lovely enough in the sun. After dark, well, it's practically so much fun it can barely count as warfare at all.

[Filter: Davan]

Any day, any moment, you could die. You kill ten men, and you start to think "every single one of them was just like me. I could have died on any of their swords the same way they died on mine."

How is it that we're not dead yet?
Mood: blahblah
27 February 2011 @ 12:51 am
[Filter: Private]

You know, this is a lot harder than I thought. I didn't think it was going to be easy, but you know, I've got to do what I've got to do. So I had this crazy idea that I wasn't going to stop until I won her heart. If I were in Floran now, I'd have it. There's not even a question. I've got it now.

These fucking journals, I don't know. See, they let me get into this group. They let me start talking to women all over the world. And I'm a one woman kind of guy. I don't cheat at cards, I don't often cheat with women. It's not that I can't, I can do both. Chose early on that I wasn't going to do it because it was too easy. No whores, no real cheating. I don't need it to get by, I'm good enough at changing people's minds on my own.

Yeah, that little kid on the boat who would've been put off the ship unless he turned on the charm? Yeah, that little shit grew up fast, daddy can't help you when your captain's a loon. That's why I don't mind having a loon for a captain out here. Then again, we're all crazy.

Oh right, the point. Yeah, see, I used to be able to tear myself away from the girls. No address, forgettable face, good luck trying to find me if I made you love me ladies. And I didn't even want love. Most of them knew that, didn't they? Whatever. But with these journals, I can't get away from her.

If I was smart I would just break it off now. Can't cheat on her, means I'm stuck by myself on the coldest nights of the year in the coldest country in the world. And see, the smart thing would be to do anything I could to grab some kind of warmth. A warm body, Korin is full of people who want to couple together to fight off the ice. No need to promise anything but a fun time, and maybe some booze.

I am so fucking dumb. Just that whole conversation with her making me smile like I just ate out of the privy, asking for seconds. Dragons, you dumb, cold man. Fuck you, Jack.

I should find someone else's problem to fix.

[Filter: Calaith]

Lauren, eh?
27 February 2011 @ 01:58 am
Anton just told me Demi is gonna spend the night with us again!!! We can make it a SLUMBER PARTY and it'll be awesome and so much fun and I haven't had a slumber party in forever and we can stay up all night and talk about everything and have snacks and it's going to be the best slumber party ever!!!
Mood: bouncybouncy
27 February 2011 @ 02:05 am
[Filter: House Fairen]

I ...

Cameryn and I have decided that we're going to come home and visit, for a little while. I need some time to ... to recover from everything. I'm sorry to impose on you, but it has been so long since I've been home ... and I need to just be away from here for a while.

I'll look forward to seeing all of you ...
Mood: indescribableindescribable
27 February 2011 @ 02:47 am
[Filter: Private]

I don't --

He left Colndor. He left us. He left -- me. And he never fucking looked back, not once, and it was all because of that city. Lucas went to his fancy home up the hill and there wasn't any room for Kooly, not anymore. He was so quick to just fucking erase years, fucking years, that he and I spent together here in Colndor, because that's what Norey folk are like, they don't fucking care about anyone who isn't in their club. Norey does that to people. Norey makes everyone into that. Fuck Norey. Norey did this.

That's ... what I've always said. It made sense, that's what changed, right? Blame fucking Norey. Blame the big fucking city for coming along and taking him away.

... a whole lot fucking easier than just admitting that it was him. It was his choice. And it was his fault. A whole ... lot easier.

[Filter: Lark]


Got a sec?
Mood: blahblah
Caitlin of Bresa
27 February 2011 @ 03:55 am
[Filter: Private, in Kilian]

Who is she to-

That girl has been nothing but trouble for us. How Peter can even think to do this is just [illegible] I am her mother.

[long pause]

But what can I do? The decision has been made already.

Without me.
27 February 2011 @ 04:01 am
Fine, Damien, fine. I decided to tell Bea that your new fast shit is going to help you move quicker. She smiled and got excited and told me to tell you that she's glad and that's good news, and to tell me so I can tell her the second you find out anything worth saying.

I knew it would get her hopes up. I shouldn't have opened my mouth.

Why don't you just give this up? Tell Bea that you couldn't find anything, and just take up merchant sailoring. You'd be doing her and Noye more good patrolling our shiplanes, you know, instead of chasing down daydreams.
Mood: annoyedannoyed
Queen Edalene of Atsiria
27 February 2011 @ 04:22 am
[Filter: Joseph, in Atsirian]

... I did get the gift, you know. The one that you sent me after Rose Day. I did. I haven't said anything about it, but I did.

I just have been thinking about what to say, that's all.
Mood: nervousunsure
27 February 2011 @ 04:30 am
[Filter: Private, in Atsirian]

Oh, it's so strange when James-Chauncy just writes about he and I like that, in front of everyone. It's not a secret, but I feel so exposed and silly. Half of them probably don't even know he's talking about me, but that doesn't make it better, that makes it worse!

I guess I want everyone to know that we're courting ... but I don't want everyone to think of his brothers teasing him about me, especially not if they're saying things about me that aren't nice.

[there is a long pause]

... could it be that Karlesta really doesn't have someone in her life?

That just doesn't seem possible! Not at all! For me to be courting, and for her to not, that just doesn't make sense. She's the elder, and M -- my first Mother always said that she'd find a good husband while I was still struggling to find out how to even talk to a man. And she was always prettier than I was.

It's true that I always had more boy friends, but that's different. It's only because ... I was always so much like them. They didn't see me as a girl. I wasn't scary to them. I never told them what to do. I was just like them ... they may have all hated Karlesta, but I'm sure they noticed when she got to be that age.

And now ...

I'm not even seventeen! And Karlesta is nineteen! And James and I really are courting. Oh, that still seems so strange to think of as being real, but it is. How could it be that Karlesta isn't?

I know she had someone ... I've heard people talk about her and Joseph Eshene, when I'm using all the listening techniques Lady Mother has me practice at parties. They sometimes talk about it right to me. I don't think anyone knows that we were sisters, once. I remember her writing about it, too, back before my ... break. From the journals ... and from her. So I know it isn't like I've won a race, or something like that.

But that doesn't change that I'm courting a man, and Karlesta isn't.

Is it ... bad of me, to feel a little proud?
Mood: satisfiedsmug
27 February 2011 @ 04:32 am
[Filter: Daisy]

Er --

I just read what Inara wrote. Did ... something happen? With you and Demi?
Mood: worriedworried
27 February 2011 @ 07:01 am
[Filter: Private]

It was pretty much impossible to mistake those signals.

... wasn't it? I don't know. He almost seems confused that I'm upset. If he knew why, if he knows what's bothering me, why be confused?

Was I not obvious enough? I mean, ribbons and candles and fake rose petals ... that's a little hard to read wrong, isn't it? And I think I was being inviting. Ugh. I don't know! I've never been good at this. I've never wanted to be good at this.

I just ... I really was ready. Am ready. And I really thought that all this time, he'd just been waiting for that, for me. If he's not, and never was, what does that mean? What is he waiting for?

I really don't want to start thinking about what Jace said, again. I don't want to be like that.

[Filter: Faith]

Mood: pessimisticpessimistic
27 February 2011 @ 07:44 am
[Filter: Privit]

I really ... really really really missed her.

[Filter: Public]

I had a wonderful time with Ariel, today! Thank yuu, thank you, thank yuo, Father, for letting me see her, even though it was just for a little wile. I don't think I can thank yuo enugh!

I'm going to keep working hard. Yuor not going to be disapointed in me!
Mood: happyhappy
27 February 2011 @ 08:16 am
[Filter: Private, in Atsirian]

Yes, Edalene. Of course, Edalene.

Poor thing. You have no idea what happens at the end of this story, and what you just gave me permission to do. You see, you play your hands showing everyone your cards, Edalene. You've said all I need to hear. All that's keeping me off that throne is Lord Matthew, and, well, fellow like that?

All it will take is a few good snips, and down he falls.

[Filter: Westa, in Atsirian]

You were right. I was a fool to ever try and give up.
Mood: predatorypredatory
27 February 2011 @ 08:20 am
[Filter: Franelcrew not born in February]

... is there anything I can do? For tonight? I'd really like to help, if I can ...
Mood: nervousshy
27 February 2011 @ 08:25 am
Ebony was certainly looking smug today. It certainly seems as if she is back to her old self. Do I even want to know what's given her the right to feel as though she deserves to wear that look? Whatever it is, it's never good for me!

Her sycophants certainly know what it is. Did anyone else see the looks they kept shooting me, today? As if they knew something I didn't! Well, as if I care what their dark queen is up to! I have far better things to do than concern myself with her!

And don't you all come and say "oh, I know, she's so awful," because I saw you admiring her black lace gloves. Yes, I know who you are! I saw you looking! And I'm going to do you the decency of not calling you by name, so long as you'll do me the decency of not pretending to be on my side!

[Filter: Philip

Now, do you remember our appointment?
Mood: aggravatedaggravated
27 February 2011 @ 08:28 am
Someone's heard it!!

The song! The song I've been singing! The song that he wrote for me, and only sang it to me! Someone had heard it!

Ah at first I was only happy because I thought that it was spreading just like I wanted it to be, but then, when I got to the verse I added about how I was looking for him and waiting for him, the man stopped me and said he'd never heard that part before!

Does everyone realize that that means!?
Mood: ecstaticecstatic
27 February 2011 @ 08:31 am
[the writing is unsteady]

[Filter: Norman, in Kilian]

Oh, Dragons ...
Mood: indescribableindescribable
27 February 2011 @ 08:35 am
[Filter: Private]

There's no tea.

There's no tea. There's nowhere to get tea. It's all gone. Everything Lysander has been doing with the supply trains ... it's taken away the tea.

There's none left. Nowhere.

How long has it been since I had a real dose? How many times have I been to Keran's bed since then? How long ... how long will it take before ... before ...

No, no, no.

... the Crow.

I need to focus on the Crow. I need to think about the Crow. He's still down there, and I might be able to free him. He could do so much good. He could work with Lysander. He could be a rallying point. He could be a symbol. I could save him. I know the guard patrols. I could move down quickly enough. I'm quiet. I know how to been unseen. I spent so long practicing. I could do it. I could save him. I could save him, if I can just focus. Focus on the Crow, just the Crow. Get a plan, Colleen. Work up your courage and then get a plan.

There's no tea.

There's no tea.
Mood: indescribableindescribable
27 February 2011 @ 08:39 am
[Filter: Destin]


... I ... I don't know if I can do this. I really don't.

It's this guilt. I've heard what Daddy is doing. Telling people about what we told him happened. Just the right people, just so it'll spread ever so slowly and poison everyone. He doesn't want Forbes's life to be ruined quickly. He wants it to hurt. I don't --

I don't know if I can watch it happen, just sitting up here, locked away, living with this guilt. I know what really happened, even if Forbes doesn't. I know that I'm the one who ...

I don't -- I don't know if I can.

What should I do?
Mood: distresseddistressed
Lady Cerise of House Allba
27 February 2011 @ 08:44 am
[Filter: Private]

It ...

It can't be, can it? It can't be.

Not after all this time. I-I ... Rylan might be being drugged, and it's been so long since we were married, and nothing has changed, and I haven't found anything and nothing has been resolved, and it's so impossible and, and ...

And I swear, I swear, I -- I'm beginning to think that I might be pregnant.
Mood: shockedshocked
Laurel of Nallen
27 February 2011 @ 02:58 pm
[there's a drawing of a snowman surrounded by an assortment of flowers here. While it's clear there was a lot of work put into it, it's rather sketchy and obvious that the artist lacks confidence in her skill]

Maybe someday I'll be able to do that. I love the thought of pretty flowers blooming amidst the snow.

[Filter: Private]

Carrie still seems a bit...I don't know how much our outing helped her, she seemed happy enough, but...oh, I do wish I knew what happened!
Mood: contemplativecontemplative
27 February 2011 @ 03:00 pm
Boy, I sure am gonna miss the snow when it's gone! Now that I remember how great snowball fights are I'm not ready for the winter to end...oh, well. Guess I'll just have to enjoy it while it still lasts.

[Filter: Private]

The snowball fights seem to distract Tina from what happened with Kevin, but the snow's not gonna be here for much longer. She needs something to be excited about, something to make her feel useful and wanted. I can't let her spend all her time here moping about some jerk who never deserved her!

...hmm. I wonder...

[Filter: Miss Eri]

Hey, you got a moment?
Mood: thoughtfulthoughtful
Kenneth of Glashen
27 February 2011 @ 03:17 pm
It seems my poor mother has fallen under the weather. Of course, she insists on being confined to her rooms so as not to endanger my wife's health, but I will be sure to visit her as often as possible while she recovers.

[Filter: Private]

Never a dull moment around here as of late. And there could still be a murderer in our midst...thankfully I have Wendy and Mackenzie to help me. They seem to understand how important this is.

And thankfully, Mother has always been the hardy sort. A sudden bout of illness is hardly anything to be concerned over.
Mood: busybusy
27 February 2011 @ 03:52 pm
[Filter: House Veirnan]

Hello...I hope everyone is still doing well. We're fine over here, and of course we both miss you all dearly. I...I'm still not sure exactly when Edeyn plans for us to return, but I will ask her tonight.
Lysander of Mera
27 February 2011 @ 05:55 pm
[Filter: Verity]

Do you think she's told anyone? The waiting is getting to me. I know it's going to take time, but ...
Mood: nervousnervous
Mi (Hermione)
27 February 2011 @ 06:02 pm
[Filter: Private]

Does she -- what is she looking at me like that for? I haven't even done anything lately to make her angry, but she won't stop ... glaring, like I have. Like --

I just

I wish we could be friends again. I wish I hadn't done it, if it made things like this between us for the rest of our lives. It was so nice when I had somebody that I could really talk to about everything. The other guys are okay, now that they're used to me and they don't -- expect me to do anything weird anymore. But it was nice just to have someone I could sit around and talk to, and --

Is that what she wants, is for me to go up and say I'm sorry? Say I wish I hadn't done it? It's been so long. I wish she would just --

Why now? What's gotten her doing this now? I don't understand. I haven't even done anything.
27 February 2011 @ 06:28 pm
[Filter: Lord Keran]

Are you ever going to let me out of this room? It's been so long. I'm not going to try anything. You have to believe me, that I'm not going to try anything. I didn't tell the Crow where you were. I didn't.
Mood: scaredscared
27 February 2011 @ 06:31 pm
[Filter: Princess Seraphine]

Princess, now, I'm afraid I have a bit of unfortunate news to share with you. I hope you'll forgive me for it, but I thought I ought to let you know early. Do you have a spare moment? I do beg your forgiveness for taking up some of your time only to make a disappointing announcement, but some things must be done.
Mood: workingworking
27 February 2011 @ 06:47 pm
[Filter: Lenore]

You know, me and your sister talked a little, before Rose Day. Helped me get your flowers, and all that.

Thing is, I still think she don't like me none. Maybe I'm reading her wrong, you know her better, but I wish she'd just give a fellow a chance. You know what I mean, don't you, sweetheart? It's how she looks at me. You watch her, sometime when I come to pick you up for dinner. See how she glares at me, you'll see.
27 February 2011 @ 09:16 pm
[Filter: Private]

Well, well, a decision will have to be made about Father soon. I don't think anyone is as foolishly optimistic to suggest that he will make a full recovery, if at all. No, we will have to accept the possibility that he will not be the man he was. And, depending on the assessment of others more knowledgeable than myself, he may need constant care for the rest of his life, a kind of care we may not be able to provide here in Fairen.

Hm, yes, I will have to look into our accounts to see if we can afford such an option, if it is offered.
Mood: deviousdevious
Nerida of Allba
27 February 2011 @ 09:28 pm
Hm, I received a very interesting letter from Myles this morning~ He said that he may be visiting Rowan in the coming months. Now, this is interesting news in itself, but he couldn't resist a hint that he may not be the only visitor Rowan will receive, only he could not reveal anything more at this point. Isn't that just awful of him? He always did delight in stoking my curiosity. He just wants me to ask him who is coming along with him, but I refuse to give him that satisfaction~

So, darling brothers and goodsisters, you will tell me if you will be visiting me soon, now won't you~?
Mood: curiouscurious
Lady Tyrande of House Sarris
27 February 2011 @ 09:53 pm

We have had more visitors of late, ever since news of the Queen's stay here spread, and of the Prophet Melyndra as well. More merchants and scholars, most of all. I would like to find a way to capitalise on this newfound trade, of course, before the flow ebbs. The people are eager to buy from the visiting merchants at least, so I hope that will encourage them to return. I have not known a merchant to refuse money. The scholars, I hope are impressed with the improvements that have been made to the libraries. I have heard comments on the comfort and ease of use, which is most encouraging.

Mm, the next month is most promising indeed. And it will be Marinda's first birthday soon. I hope to make it an occasion to remember.
27 February 2011 @ 10:30 pm
[Filter: Private]

This is so much harder than I thought it'd be. I ain't used to havin to hold back like this. Everything I do I worry I'm gonna go and scare him off and it's so hard. Even somethin as simple as just holdin hands I always feel like he wants to pull away from me.

It's nice though, in a way. Every other relationship I've had just feels like sex. There ain't ever anything else to it and it's a nice change. I still want to jump him every time we're alone together and I'd do anything for a bit of action, but there's more to it than just that, and it's nice. I just don't want to scare him away.

[Filter: Public]

Hey Mark~ after we close everything up tonight, would you like to go for a walk? I need to get outta here for a little while, and would love some company~
Mood: hornyhorny
27 February 2011 @ 10:38 pm
Taking longer for some of my regulars to come back in than I thought it would. Never would have thought they'd go and hold a grudge like that. It isn't even like I deceived them, all the ones who came in here normally knew better and I wasn't about to sell it to them anyways. They have to come around eventually, right?
Mood: worriedworried
27 February 2011 @ 11:13 pm

I can't believe I'm almost done with this book! It seems like only yesterday I'd started reading. Ah, I'll certainly be sad to see it end, the characters and the story have been so engaging...I'll definitely be re-reading this one in the near future. If it wasn't one of my all-time favorites before, it is now.
Mood: enthralledenthralled
Father Forbes of Megam
27 February 2011 @ 11:33 pm
[Filter: Private]

I found it. It was hard to do but I found the pages where I convinced myself that I could fix what I did. I found the page just after we... And I found my conversation with Elliot.

She was agitated. It was a very tense time. How did I miss that she didn't want to continue it? Was I so wrapped up in my own pride, my own desire to make it work between us that I... Did I make her think that I would've told everyone everything? Was she only with me after that because of fear?

Three quarters of the entire time we've been together has been after that point. How could I have missed that for so long, that I hurt her so deeply that she couldn't even stand the thought...

[Filter: Elliot]

I have good news, and the most terrible news you can imagine. And the good news is that despite how guilty I feel about the terrible news, at least I still have my career so I can try to make amends for it...